The holiday season brings family and friends together, making it the perfect time to reconnect—even with those hard-to-reach teenagers. Anyone who’s spent time with teens knows that keeping their attention can be a challenge. Between the constant pull of screens, plans with friends, and their unusual sleep schedule, it’s easy for them to drift away. It’s normal for teenagers to pull away a bit from family as they start to explore their own identities and independence. Developmentally, they’re focused on figuring out who they are and may feel more connected to their peers. Sometimes, they may also feel misunderstood or judged by family members, which can make family gatherings feel more like an obligation than an opportunity for connection.
To help bridge the gap, here are our Top Tips to engage with teens for some important face-time this Christmas season:
- Give Them Some Space and Choice: Rather than forcing every family tradition, allow teens to have some say in holiday activities. For instance, ask if they’d like to pick a family game or activity. Giving them ownership can make them feel more involved and respected.
- Create Low-Pressure Interactions: Teens often feel uncomfortable with forced, intense conversations. Plan for casual activities like baking cookies, doing a puzzle, or watching a movie together, where interaction can happen naturally without feeling forced.
- Find Activities They Genuinely Enjoy: Whether it’s a competitive game, a fun DIY project, or even something digital like a family TikTok challenge, tapping into their interests makes engagement more appealing.
- Encourage Bonding with Other Family Members: Sometimes, teens might feel closer to extended family members or younger cousins. Giving them time to interact in smaller groups can make family gatherings more enjoyable, and make time to go visit grandparents or other important family figures!
- Acknowledge and Appreciate Their Presence: Simply letting them know that you’re glad they’re there can go a long way. Teens want to feel valued, so offer genuine gratitude for their involvement without demanding too much.
It never hurts to dangle food and prizes in front of distracted teens to grab their attention. A good-natured competition with candy or cash prizes just might do the trick. Here are a few activities that might keep them around for a bit:
- The Saran Wrap Game – This one’s a crowd-pleaser, no matter who you are. Wrap up a bunch of candy, a few dollar bills, maybe even a gift card or two inside a giant ball of clear food wrap. Break off the wrap every so often so that it will come off in pieces, not in one long strand. Each participant takes turns unwrapping a bit while wearing oven mitts as their neighbor rolls dice. When doubles are rolled, the turn passes to the next person. This game is guaranteed to spark laughter! Learn more here from The Diy Village.
- Advent Calendar: Put a note in each day’s window that says what fun may happen that day. A few ideas include: Watch a Christmas Movie, Go see Grand Prairie Lights, Eat out at Campo Verde, Shop for the Angel tree, Bake cookies, Family game night, Deliver treats, Go ice-skating, Attend church, Re-enact the Nativity story, Friends coming over, Wii tournaments, or whatever your traditions include. Consider hiding the idea within a clue or poem so they have to figure it out.
- Punch Out Tree – This gift tree can be used as an advent activity or a party game where everyone takes turns punching out a treat. Hide small surprises inside, like coupons for a free home car wash, a day off from chores, or cash, candy bars, or small toys. Include some less valuable items, like a bouncy ball, to keep everyone guessing. Watching each person receive their treat is half the fun! Instructions here from ItsAlwaysAutumn.
- Ping Pong Muffin Tin Challenge – Set up this silly game for lots of laughs! Label a muffin tin with numbers 1-18 and place corresponding solo cups face down nearby, each hiding a treat or a trick. Competitors take turns bouncing a ping pong ball down the table, aiming for a numbered spot in the tin, and winning the prize under the matching cup. Will it be a gift card or a handful of peppermints? Must be present to win! See the game here from Todays Fabulous Finds.
- Elf on the Shelf: Get teens involved in hiding Elfie (or Elfina) or creating funny scenes with the elf for younger kids to find.
With these tips and games, you’ll be able to encourage your teens to spend quality time with family while keeping things light and fun. Remember, it’s all about finding connection, laughter, and a bit of competition to make lasting holiday memories.
Written by Tina Clark
Professionally Reviewed by Eric Cupp, Chief Compassion Officer